MeeN RocKs!!

Saturday, August 30, 2008

hahas!! ok.. yue han ask me out to pei him to go to some hp shop to fix his lovely hp that he got to use another spare phone which is SO SEXY! LOL!!!! i cant stop laughing the moment i saw that his spare hp was so cute!!! it looks like a toy but it is actually workable!! hahas.. then my leg hurts A LOT! cause SOMEBODY wants to walk from wheelock to plaza sing instead of taking a damn bus! hahas but the walk was fun... talk alot of crap! XD

met up with ting a ling a ling... and then yuehan and i got desiao by him... so both of us wallop ting a ling up. hahas!! since yuehan complaint that he was hungry, we went to grab a bite and then i wanted to get a new jacket.. so we went to look for a jacket... which we went to rip curl shop? and then the nicest jacket was YUEHAN'S jacket?! like wth!! then i cant get the same jacket as him if not ppl will think the wrong way? then like so crap.. hahas!! then later ting a ling was like holding my arm and we acted as though we r some SISTERS!!! when he is acting GAY LOL!!!! then later i don seem to be affected by it.. so he went to desiao yuehan!! hahas!!

and guess what... yuehan was SOOO affected by it man!! hahas!! then i saw my primary school form teacher... with her family.. XD awww.... so sweet leh.. hahas^^ but in the end still cant find the jacket that is to my liking and so we all went home.. XD ok... then after went home to rot awhile, i went out again!!! sad to say, amanda[mummy] has something going on with her bro and cant make it to go with me to some seeing of the plane with munwai which i had told him i will be able to make it... munwai, SORRY! XD [ ps.. first time agreeing to b going out tgt with friends but in the end cant make it ]

on the way to meet ashley at vivo the time, hongyeow called and he gave me some shit attitude... and i just hang his call? its like totally shit la.. call only give me attitude as if i deserve it. then after more then an hour later then he sms me back to say that he was sorry for giving me attitude and that his attitude suck. then i was like.. you can change your attitude. its only you wan to or not. and he was like... " i will change because i want to. " i was like... " ok then all the best to u. " hahas kinda sarcastic rite? XD aiya.. like dots lor he kepts showing me attitude.. and its not like the first time?

then ashley was like telling my hongyeow is very nice to be but can be a pain in the ass at times.. then i was like kept laughing! XD and.... MY LEG HURTS!!! and i ate something i NEVER tried before and it was the korean rice cake.. it is nice!! XD im going to have it again the next time i go to vivo!! woots!! [ OMG! just remembered that hongyeow called me fat not long ago.. -.-''....... anyway who cares im happy~ XD ] hahas!! ^^ well.... hahas later ash cuz send me back to my jail.. and that we were both happy!! XD

MeeN is really glad that she can put a smile on people's face and that she is Happy today XD

Friday, August 29, 2008

im so crapped up la... friends problem still never mind... i totally don't know what the hell is exactly wrong with my dad la.. its like what the fuck? every single day he is coming home look at me with that attitude eyes of his.. and its not like only for today you know? it is like, he has been showing me attitude yesterday? and the day before? and at first i thought that it is because of his work load or stuff like that..

But, i realise i was totally wrong la.. its like he is so nice and can laugh, smile and joke with the rest of my family members like my bro and my mum... but when he place his eyes on me is like with that attitude? i mean like what's wrong with you?! you are my father and what the fuck do you want from me? if you were to say that i always show you attitude, can you like reflect on yourself that actually your attitude is like shit to me too? you are always looking with my with that kind of attitude and even claim that i don wanna talk to you or showed you an attitude face.

Pls man, i have like friends problem? and like you all would even bother to ask? what shit parents are you all? and without even concerning me its still fine. without any prove, you both saw that i look down, sad or emotionless at home, and straight, i don even know wat cow sense you all have and thinks that i have got a Boyfriend?! and i already told you that i don have. like whats there to lie about this la? its so lame lor.. and there you go NOT believing in me and looking at me with that doubtfull look? im your OWN BLOOD DAUGHTER leh... ain't you suppose to believe me?

and why did you all even bother to ask hows my day when any comments that i give, in the end you all will just give me a ass attiude and saying all the crap stuff.. as also siding my teachers and ALWAYS think that my teacher is right. if you all always think it that way, then why even bother to ask me?! like im trying to voice out how i feel? and instead you both gave me attitude? than i would rather keep everything to myself.. i have no idea how much i can still bottle this feelings of mine. cause you don even care? im not like jealous or what that you all are spending so much lovely time together with my bro?

cause since long ago, i already can't feel the love from you if you are even giving me any? all you all think of me as is a Rebellious, stubborn, not willing to listen to other's peoples comments? and even more stuff. and if im really that kind of person, why would i still have friends? its like you have put me till the end until i am already scare that you might be piss at me and i would just tell you straight in the face of yours saying " what you wan me to do then you can stop showing me your ass attitude. " and that is what i did today. i said that. but whats your reply? just walking out of me without giving any reply.. its like wtf...

even now my friends are already sick and tired of having me to have this crap "family problem"? but its like what can i do man... the fact is, you are always giving me this attitude you know? and can you believe it is so frequen that my friend can give remarks like.. " haiz.. your parents again ar... you and your parents problem like eat rice like that... everyday also got de.. its Normal la.. " like can you believe my friend said such a thing Not even realising how hurting it is? i mean like who likes to have family problem? and its like even my friends can say its sick and tired already. how about me that is the one that have been experiencing this?

its like my mental health is getting from bad to worse? and no one is even noticing as i hide my feelings when im with my friends? like give me a break man... today i was just making some things out of beads as tomorrow is teacher's day.. and i he saw my beads... so after that i ask him is it nice anot.. and guess whats the comment he gave me... he says with an attitude expression.. " so you are gonna spend your time just on beads..... " [ aiya i don even know did u all get my tune anot.. as im typing it out.. and u cant feel the tone he use to say this? its like just so hurting lor..] and besides, its not as if i spend alot of time doing that rite?

like why must you always put it that way? beads is my hobby what... and there you go not even giving any moral support but just plain hurting words.. its not like i didn't study right? like why do you always have a problem with me? what do you like wat me to do? everyday be some kind of nerd and just study? BUT, sorry man, im totally not that kind of person? i can even bet that if i were to request to you that i wanted to see a shrink... i think you will just laugh you ass of thinking that im bullshitting.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

ahhhh my lovely daddy[hongyeow] just called me FAT!! hahas!!! ahhhh!!! im fat!! SHIT man!! lolxD who cares hahas!! i think i sot le.. well but since u say im fat then i try to lose weight lo... -.-'' [ although i don think i will ever do it.. hahahs!! XD ] fat FAT fat FAT fat FAT!! hahas!! anyway, no matter what it is, im 100% SherMeeN!!! XD so not to worry.. hahas!! fat le!! HOw HOW HOW!! XD [ ting a ling a ling must go running with me XD ]

today got PE lesson... walau stupid cassandra!! hahas!! XD you aim where man!! im your teammate and you wack the ball on my head... the ball so hard very pain de leh!! must throw to other side mah.. hahas!! make me laugh until i fall to the ground feeling dizzy.. hahas next time cannot team with u ar.. you will murder me man! XD okie... then it was like a slacking session at PE!!! ^^ i just sprint for like 2 rounds around the soccer field!! XD without stopping!! hahas.. and me and cherie were like so much ahead of the rest... but after end, i can't breath.. [ i forgot im not suppose to run like that -.-'' ]

oh ya,, and i would really really want to thank everyone that have been there for me rain or shine!! XD

~Amanda[mummy]~
~Ashley[stead]~
~Nicholas~
~Kelvin[uncle]~
~YueHan~
~Leon~
~Lengchye~
~Joanne[sexy]~
~YueQin[laogong]~
~Nasrathul~
~HongYeow[daddy]~
~WeiMei[pmfa]~
~Janine~
~Ahjess[gan mei]~
~Alex[audi fam ldr]~

if i ever miss out anyone PLS forgive me!! im really sorry! but really a BIG THANK YOU for all of your moral support!! in times of need, you stood by me giving me all your unlimited love... i am really very touched by what you all did!! and its all from the bottom of my heart!! like there is a saying, friends will be there for each other whether you know it or not and no matter how bad things turn out between any of your friends, they are actually right there beside you helping you in the dark.. =) So may you all be HappyAlways and SMILE!! as you all look the best when the smile comes deep within your heart.. ^^

[ Rain OR Shine, Happy OR Sad, Ugly OR Beautiful and on war or not, a True Friend will always be there supporting you be it in the dark or open, cherish them and do not let go off them.. as they are more precious than Diamonds! XD ]

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

i don even know what kind of day is today... can't put it as crap? can't put it as shitty and i also can't put it as happy either.. it's just so stupid or what.. first having lessons and was kinda lame? i was so tired that i can barely open my eyes and i am just glad that there is not much of teaching today and i just slacked at class.. hahas!! ok.. then today.. seems so be putting a smile too. [ although it don really mean that im happy, but at least im still able to put a smile on my face.. means its not to the extend until im that bad.. XD ]

after school have choir! and we went for sectionals.. and when we are having our sectionals there is a roach that came to disturb us.. hahas!! and that carmen aka jia wen ask that who is scare of roaches raise up your hands... and not many people raise their hand... [ but well... im one of them that rose my hand.. HAHAS! ] then hao yuan aka hui jun's bro, he was the brave one that wasn't scare of roaches and went to catch and killed it.. and as u all know.. they have legs to run.. the roach went to us!! hahas but no to my side... and the other side of the girls all run away screaming... hahas!! then carmen went on saying that.. " wa... u all lie to me ar... just now ask who scare of roaches only a hand full raise up and now all run.. hahas!! "

okok.. then went back to music room for our combine section.. Style~ XD sing sing sing and that later after choir, stead-ashley called me up to chat and went home ^^ Ting-a-ling-a-ling... u call me too late la.. next time want then call me earlier ^^v hahas!! but when i reach home.. things change... my dad like came home and just showed me attitude when i din even do a thing?! like so wth... and then its like what the hell he wants from me man?! he everyday show me his bloody attitude... my whole family is like upside down? can't even stand the sight of how things are like now man... and what? my dad acts as though he is having PMS?! happy only then okok.. most of the times not happy only pick on me...

pls lor... i know you all know my blog la.. if u read it and wanna find me and say y i type this kind of things in my blog because no matter what you are my dad or mum anyone of u. i had enough ok? and im sure u all read my blog but kept quiet. to my DAD and MOM.. i cant stand home at all? sometimes both of you have this stuck up ass attitude of yours. if both of you are not happy that like because of something that happen over at your work place, DON BRING THE UNHAPPINESS HOME LA!!

Monday, August 25, 2008

it's been a long long day.. and im really very tired... almost every single day there is at least one test... got 2 shocks in a day.. which is quite an adventure as well ^^ when i reach home.. i lie on my parents bed and told them i was really really tired... and as usual, my mother can ONLY talk things to me that are regarding me school life.. wanting me to get good in this.... wanting me to get good in that.. and like thats all they know?

thinking of it really makes me upset.. my parents call me odd? and like saying to me that im not part of the family? maybe u all might thing so certain things im so emotionless already.. and i just realise that its not what i wanted and that it is because i have not feel any love at all? my parents never once showed me any care and concern until im really sick that i must be really unable to breath, move or that something serious have happen to me, then they will like actually have at least some time to spend on me.. this just makes me feel sick man... for all my life my parents only talk to me about my studies.. and even if they ever made and effort to even change the topic that they wanted to talk to me, they will somehow link back to the normal topic which is about my studies..

and can you like believe it? my parents have been trying to get my brother attention and when i went into the room, she said nothing and when my bro came, she said a whole lot of crap stuff just wanting my bro to reply and that my bro din reply and he came to lie beside me since he is tired as well... like wth rite? i have like already come to a point where i don feel any love from my parents? and maybe thats y to me, my friends are very important... parents? wont side me and give me for any form of support i need.. they would only know how to criticise me and talking this talking that... so what if no matter how they put it, they are the ones that supported me with things i needed from young..

that is like so material? i have never been brought up by them at all? and my grandmother only wants to take care of my bro and that i was being left to a maid to takecare of me? im glad that i have a maid as a best friend.. although she is a maid, she is as though my best friend that have always been staying over at my house.. but, my parents send her away after 12 years of my life with her? and when she left, i totally feel so lost and don even know wat to do. i feel this is so crap? like wth my parents wan with me? they can even ask me to go overseas just because they have no time for me and that since i don like to stay at home and neither do they wan to see my face everyday. its like so wtf?

oh and bev.. erm.. i can't stop ppl from liking me? and that if got someone like me than i tell u lor.. as a friend before, we share thoughs and feelings what.. din u tell them to me too? and besides, they r all factual what... and now who's the one hanging on the past? saying drop it drop it.. and claiming that i did not drop it whereas im not even saying a thing about it and you are still hanging there... and if u really wanna pick on me with this issuse, they asked for my opinion. if they think its not right, they could have made their own judement? and i said that it would look good on them mah.. its the truth what.

and so whats wrong with just giving a piece of my mind since they r asking for my real actual opinion and u keeps hanging there and only shooting me back with " since u r a prefect i should tell them the right thing and stuff like that. " but if i say this, you would think that im insulting you? and i don even wanna make u think that im insulting u cause i wan peace? but if u r pushing the blame on me for everything just because we enter to the hair shop? then person before we enter said that we r just to go in and they will give us advices on our hair and stuff like that.

and after when we entered the shop, you all are the one that ask me? and if u keeps hanging saying its my fault or wat like wats the point? i am just giving my opinion what. and even if they hear my opinion, they can still choose not to do this what? now the way that u r putting it is that actaully u r kinda insulting them that they have no brains to think for their own? i mean if a person don wanna do it, they just wont do it what.

and bev, once again, i seriously din tell hy anything. y u keep thinking that i would tell him something?! [ u will say like cause he is my daddy? or close to me? ] its like i already said that its cuz he like me not as a daddy anymore wat. and i don even know how the hell he knows? and i don even think he knows wat is actually going on lor.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

hmm.... y is there a need to act nice infront of my friends? if u ask everyone of my friends, they have all taken my shit before and i have taken theirs... but we r always ok after a day and start going out once again and talking to each other. and like what you said.. if you think im insulting you, when im not or maybe its the tone prob? i have no idea? and then over at your bloggy, you have repeatedly saying that i snatch your friends and those sort.. saying i don wanna see your face, you don wanna see my face and stuff like that..

whats the point of snatching your friends and so what if you don need those friends or whatever? thats like not the point you see? the main point is that y must we always end up like that? and if you really saying im snatching your friends? then who are your friends? and now is that you don wanna talk to me and you don wanna see my face. not i don wanna see yours. and i do believe that the unknown person that is someone related to you. and i have already said.. you keep on saying that im the one that look back.. keeps hanging on if u think i did..

ok if u wanna think it that way, then ok don talk bout that. even if i tell u im like letting go? i don think u will even believe rite? because u always think that it could nv happen so easily.. and if u insist that im not letting go, then i have nth else to say.. and all i could say is.. u r just holding on.. this donno wat war is this could have still go on if i was like piss or even unhappy about ur remarks at your bloggy.. but i din what.. and if you stated that i was waiting for time to pass or your sorry? is like y would i even wait for your sorry knowing that i wont even have one in the first place? and im sure that you won't give me a sorry and i have like never evern ask for a sorry from you? lolxD

the second thing is that, im waiting for time to pass... hmmm... maybe im really waiting for time to pass? who would like to stay in this kind of situation.. unless u r telling me that you like it. and you kept on saying that im the one that started things. and think i know wat you even said it lor. if u have seen my blog carefully, it states on the 29 july that i dont wan anyone to even question me or ask me to put anything regarding on wat happen during the trip lor. then later on i got this post saying "this is all i know" that post was being posted because i was being confronted by maple about that sentence that i told you about in my previous post.

and like.. how would i even know that you don know about it? and i am sure and even comfirm that there are things that i don't know of as well. like maybe when u get to know it, its like too late? but did u ever bother to come and tell me? no? you din rite? and so im not even pushing the blame here and i just wan u to know the facts. if u always think im the one that started it, maybe its one of your freinds that inflicted unreasonable threats on me when i don even know a thing about what happen thats y i got concern? and when i realise what happen, you refuse to believe it thinking that im this kind of person.

and like what i said again. you said that i donno alot of things.. its true that i donno alot of things.. but there is a lot of things that u don know as well. and im like not allow to mention anything? there are alot of things that u think that may have come the way it is? aiyo... wat m i talking man... anyway.. if u ever realise y things r coming so easy the way they are, it may not always be because it is just the way they r.

bev, none of my freinds are like going after you lor.. you do you always think that my friends are like coming after you?? there is no reason for them to come after you.. and besides, i din wan our friendship to turn sour either. and its like is it just so hard to just be normal friends and live our life off.. and besides.. amanda [ mummy ] knows that she is a bitch.. and she also knows that a lot of people have called her a bitch.. so i donno when did i told u, maybe its last year. but im sure she is ok with it as i even told infront of her. and even i told her that? like whats wrong, she wanna be bitchy is my prob? we still ended up being good freinds what..and that i donno which one of ur friends don't like believe you?

besides.. i have no idea y must you always have such a harsh tone. cant we just talk things out? instead of just typing on our blog? [ and you will maybe like say, there is nth i wanna talk with you this kind of ppl? ] but seriously la.. even if we cant be good friends just be normal friends la.. im sure u have been affect cause of this also wat. and so am i. and im also sure that u are also sick and tired of it already. and so am i. so why doncha just let bygones be bygones and just let it pass. and if i don understand you as a friend, i would already be finding you up and talking straight up to your face liao.. it is cause i also know that you needed sometime to cool down thats y i din went up to you yet. hoping that u wont flare up.

if both of us keep hanging on with this kind of thing just because of one overseas trip is also seriously not worth it lor.. and i don even know u would like even be bothered about what im saying or even care bout it anot. but i din even tell anyone what happen during the overseas trip until i found out that things are happening without my knowing. and it all started with this ugly sight when i din even know wat hy told u. and when i wanted to call you to clarify things, you din even picked up my call.. maybe you might not be in the right mood to pick up my call. but you din even call back. and if u ever did call back and both of us have a talk to see actually what is happening, i don even think that things would even turn out the way it is right now lor..

but maybe because u r piss or angry or whatever, you chose not to pick up.. and i have to end up asking other ppl to know what happen. and besides.. the person that knows what happen is like? your friends or wat? and as usual.. when i tried asking, none of them tell me about anything. and when i tell them about my side. the reply they gave back is " you think i would believe you? " if im really the one that did it i should know what happen and y do i even put myself into the risk of getting scolded by your freinds or what just to know what actually happen if i already know what have happen? [ and im sure u will be saying.. Oh.. cause i wanna act or something.. ] and besides.. you said that you were not happy that maple confronted me like that and you were pissed off with her. its not as if i wanted u to be pissed with her as she was trying to protect you as well.. but its like how i know you knew about that or not when we cant even have a peacefull talk to like find out what is actually happeing?

and now from the tone in your blog, if it were to turn real that as if u were really talking to me. you are like shouting infront of me la. and like even if u r the one that shout, im sure u wont feel good either what. and besides, i have like only a year plus in this school? and you seriously just wan things to turn this bad to us meh.. or maybe you just really hated me la.. i can even like feel it from your tone lor.. if you seriously wan ppl to like side you and not siding me so to be your friends, just tell me who you wan and i wont talk to them. im like totally fine with it as its not like i will be in this school forever..

and.. i know you are sad because of this thing and so am i.. and i also cant say any remarks to you now to cheer you up i suppose, as you will be thinking i am such a great person that only knows how to act infront of my blog.. or can say infront of other ppl. like what i have already say. if u wanna pick on someone, there is a million and one things you can pick on.. it all depends in your perpective and how you look at things. and seriously, if you have lost freinds and so do i, then y do we still wanna lose more friends but even arguing for a stupid trip now? its u ever have even the time to think and reflect back, you think its worth it anot.

and now im sure u don even wanna talk or say anything in a peacefull manner la. everything that comes out from u r so piercing ans sharp. if on your blog u r already like that.. when u r not even opening our mouth to even just talk. how do we talk things out man. unless u tell me i have to see ur blog then type type type and you have to see my blog then type type type again meh.. if you really think im this kind of person to you, there is nothing i can do about it as its ur own mind.

MeeN is tired...

OK!!! and today is my mother's birthday!! XD put on a BIG BIG smile just to make everything bright and happy.. and i want to say.. " Happy Bithday MUMMY!!! " [ not amanda ar.. my real mother man -.-'' LOL!! ] but we like never go out? everyone was like rotting at home talking crap!! cool huh.. LOLxD ok.. and my parents suspected that i am having a BoyFriend.. -.-'' its totally CRAP can? [ omg!! omg!! JOANNE!! im talking like you!! how man!! DIE! hahas!! XD ] everybody was pretty busy.... and that stupid and funny Ting-a-ling-a-ling played webcam with me on msn.... and we are like crazy ok....

first.. im still in my PJ.. and that everytime at home i will be in my PJ unless im going out.. because i don't bother buying clothes at home as i get to sleep any time i want with my PJs on!! XD and so is like i got a lot of PJs as well.. hahas!! and because of that, he claims that ppl with PJ are like those that have just woken up or something.. but so i was finding a weapon to "kill" him? hahas!! and i found a fork!!! WOOTS!! and then he was like.. " i also have ok!! " and then he took out a SPOON!!! hahahahhas!! damn funny la!!

OH!! and about the boyfriend thing that my prarents suspected.. they knows that i don have a boyfriend as all the Boys which is my friends, my parents have seen them before and i am not like some kind of girls that will like.. scare my parents think the wrong way of me or what.. because boys and girls, anyone can also be my friend!! XD and to get things cleared, i don have a boyfriend.. LOL! to me.. being friends are just fine ^^...

Saturday, August 23, 2008

hey!! its a new day!! so lets be happy again man!! wats over is over and wats done is done.. =] so as usual. i woke up like donno wat time.. hahas and then i continued to stay in my bed thinking of what happen ytd.. hmmm.. yesterday, i went out alone and did some reflecting on myself.. ^^ and was like thinking thinking thinking.. and was like.. to say the truth, its like.. i find that there is no point being this way lor.. i would rather have a freind then a foe.

and i went to keep on changing buses and Mrt... and i went to quite a few places.. i went to.. tiong, plaza sing, lucky plaza, suntec.. hmmm... i think thats bout there.. hahas!! and was alone through out.. as everyone has their own probs.. and ashley is having a prob with leon too.. then when im at suntec.. i went to walk around.. and went to this candy shop. i bought some candies thinking that when ever im sad i would have something sweet to make me happy again XD after like 7 plus, yue han was like sms-ing me.. and that we met up at tiong... so.. both of us reach tiong at bout 8. after that amanda[mummy] know that i was feeling kinda down.. she said that she will come and meet me at bout 9 after she is done with her stuff..

and that she said she will treat me donuts!!! yum!! XD ok.. and i was eating dinner at kfc.. and yuehan was like kept watching me eat.. and see until wan to die le.. LOL!! he said that i am eating VERY SLOWLY. then soon, mummy came and also accompanied me and now.. both of them are like waiting for me to eat finish.. hahas!! then i ate till like from 8 plus.. to 9.50 like that. from the kfc the lights very bright. till they kfc lights become so much dimmer.. hahas!! after that, we went to buy donuts.. and we chose like 6!! XD supposingly yuehan gets 2 and mummy gets 2 and i got 2 XD but we wanted to sit down and enjoy our donuts but we couldn't find a sit -.-''

it was already like 10 plus when we are still finding a sit. then yuehan suggested that we go to the fith level.. and like all the shops are like close in tiong already and we still go up to the fifth level... its kinda spooky as there were not much lights lited on.. and we sat at fifth level the chairs to have our donut. soon after we kept hearing noises and yuehan is trying to scare mummy and i. but actually he was the one that was scared!! hahas!! okok.. then my dad was like fetching me.. so we took a life down.. and before we could enter the lift, yue han gave his one last shot trying to make mummy and i have a shock. but at last, he still failed.

took a lift down to the first floor.. then when the lift open.. and yue han was the first one to turn to move out from the lift.. he scared one boy outside the lift man!! its so funny then mummy and i laugh until stomach pain.. hahas!! then yuehan cant help it but laugh at himself too.. hahas!! well then we were like waiting for my dad near the taxi stand.. and at last my dad came and i went home.. XD

ok... and now, im gonna thank my freinds that helped me in times of need and although they are having their own stresses and problems. they were there for me.. =] really touched. my freinds that were there for me are.. Amanda, Nic, Yuehan, Ting-a-ling, Yue Qin, Joanne, Ashley... so now and so fore..

it have been really gald that you all are always there most of the time.. there are many others that helped me.. i really would wanna thank you all as well.. and i donno whats wrong but like my friends suddenly like.. recently, they have been also having some relationship crisis.. which consist of like bgr probs... friends... or even family.. but they were all there for me.. which i seriously appreciate a lot!! well, maybe i may not be in the perfect state for cheering you all up as i have probs as well.. LOL! but im sure no matter what happen.. friends will always be freinds no matter what happen.. so cheer up! XD

Friday, August 22, 2008

hmmm.. ok.. today as usual, have a new attitude.. and.. went in to choir with this ass attitude... but still try to put a smile on my face.. and everything was still going ok i guess? but it still sucks today.. as.. im here to post and at the same time to clarify to people that.. " I did not backstab u guys. " its like.. i don't even know what you all have heard.. and its like regarding some lengthening of the hair... its like kinda shit to explain myself.. but i cant swallow it down.

first is like.. knowing that there have been rumours that i have backstab ppl as by telling the head prefect which was also a choir member that some ppl lengthen their hair during the overseas trip. and that saying that i wanted to "sabo" them by complaining.. but sorry i am not backstabbing anyone. it is like.. its kinda obvious that the length u have extend to is long.. that i admit that is nice on you all. but by trying to not get yourself caught when we are like overseas? ok.. maybe its like you all would say its not allowed by the school and stuff..

and yeah, i know that too.. but we r like overseas? and if u all really scare u could like take them off when we get back mah. then here the thing goes.. its obvious that even if u all bun up your hair, people can still see it by the amount it has ans that its pretty obvious. so when they question me suspecting that u both lengthen your hair, i cant deny it what. its like not saying that i wanted to speak the truth. but the fact is.. its so obvious that she can kinda suspected or what? then came to ask me.. and true enough, she did came to ask me. but knowing that there was no point lying as sooner or later if she really take the means to find out.. its harder to escape the fact.

so since she ask and even suspecting, so i told her. and i told her not because im like backstabbing? but because i know her character well and we r like overseas. she wont do anything and if its really that bad she would just told me and i would have told u all. but the thing is no one would actaully like complain to the teachers as we r all students. we helped one another and not by backstabbing one another. i cant swallow down the way u all perceive me in the way that is so misunderstanding by not hetting all the facts right.

or maybe you all only would hear like one side of the story and just made your judgement. making such judgemental decision.. i don know is it because.. EVEN before that you already hated me and just wanted to ACT as my friend. and by the statement i made. it is NOT judgemental as i have a prove of it. but like what people tell me.. no one is perfect and if some people just like to pick on you, there is so much things someone can pick on. and it is whether they want to anot. but it looks like u do not have such a great liking for me and instead telling other people stuff to make them have a judgemental value too?

i would really wanna say.. " wow.. good going there. you have done a great or even superb job by doing that. " =] if you would really even cherish your friends. you should have dropped and forget the things that happen and look forward to the up coming days.

MeeN is feeling down again..

New one.. cuz just came home.. XD replies to bev. did u like said some mean stuff rite there? cuz i din see it.. someone went to my cbox to del it. but anyways.. im not the one who bear grudges k. it is cause i got the news today. how would i even know what you all like did man. and besides. i have already drop the subject and not even bearing any grudges lor.. but i donno y u r the one that kept bringing the topic back?! and instead saying that im the one that is holding on?

is like wat i have said in either one of by previous post that i just wanted to drop everything. but u r the one that keeps hanging on that made everything so ugly? and im sure u will be back shooting at whatever i say? because u r not happy with me or something? and u r the one that say u do not bear grudges. and if u don get the facts rite? the posted that was dedicated to me, from you. it states there that im a flirt going around saying i love you to guys? and for what i know.. i only say i love you to all my close freinds including guys or girls.. other then that. there can only be my online friend which were playing with me and i just play along with them.

who would take a word " i love you" so seriously? it can be serious or it can be in a friendly manner what. unless u r trying to tell me that your head could only perceive one image of the phrase " i love you ". because if thats the case, i have nothing to say. and ok.. you called me a friend snatcher. you know there was one period of time that just because i am your friend, i lost many freinds because even before that [ if you think i backstabbed you ] they are the ones that are like saying " shermeen.. y u go with this kind of ppl " and im the one that said back to them " whats wrong with her. everyone have their own character what.. "

and im also comfirm that u will sure say me back by saying.. "oh.. but i don need you to be freinds with me in the first place! " but like whats wrong with being freinds with one another man.. at least i don go around telling ppl that you suck or i hate you or what? and i even go against my friends to speak up for u? [ and im sure u will go like.. " AWW.. LIKE AS IF I WILL BELIEVE YOU! YOU BACKSTABBER!! " because that is already the way you perceive me as. a backstabber. thats why no matter how much i try to say and try to explain, will you even listen?

and you have always been showing this attitude of yours? happy only talk to ppl.. not happy only show attitude.. hello? im not trying to pin point or go agaist anyone here? as the post is dedicated to all that. every single one has their own attitude. so even if i din really like you attitude, did i even say anything bout that? and if im not wrong, last year or what i have told you nicely about your attitude. but i don think whatever im saying now you would even give a damn lor.. cause guess what. i think in your mind when u r reading this, you r only thinking of how to should be back and to show to others that you are rite.

and im not saying that you are wrong either. im just telling you that everyone has their own way of thinking and you maynot understand. thats y when ppl ask me about you. did i ever say i don like you? i never. i only told them that. you attitude is not really to my liking. but.. ok here is the main point. i have been like dropping everything from the pass and to look into the future. but you cant seem to be able to do that. maybe you just hate me or something? [ nono.. not you just hate me.. is.. u already hate me like what liao.. ] so now, whatever i say. you will always treat it that im going against you. but have you ever thought about it in another perpective?

and i guess you might be also thinking that [ oh... this shermeen must be acting in her blog sia.. say until like that like so nice like that. but actaully don mean it. ] the fact is. i do mean everything i say alrite. you may not like me.. and during the trip has cause so much unhappiness between us. like wth man.. don you feel that its kinda sad that things turn out this way? and instead of trying to savage the situation, you are like trying to make things worse and turn things ugly. [ in your mind u may think like, wtf i do man. i din even turn anything ugly lor! its you lor! ]

well thats y i shall say it once again. it is how the way u perceive of it. and i din even know Hy wanna wack you until that time maple said " if anyone dare to touch bev, you will be Next. " and besides, if u claims that im backstabbing you, when i din even know wat hy did and said to you. i could also say that u made maple to threaten me? and in future, watever happens to u, my name will be pull down for no god damn reason. cause not me also just bomb my name.

its like what happen in suzhou lor... when there is something happen to anita, huijun that gang was like saying " that beverley la.. blah blah blah" and all those shit. im sure u know it too. and i know that you r not even the one at fault and your name was being pulled down. its like the same thing lor? and im sure u will say that hy is close to me and all this shit. hello? if thats the case, all my freinds that did something or what without my knowing is also my fault la?

ok.. i will drop what happen in the trip as whatever that happen has happen. and i don even find it worth to be arguing over the past. but im sure you will think im trying to hide or act or what ever you can think of. but thats the fact. y cant you just look ahead and be happy? y r u always having this mindset that im trying to do something bad to you all and all this. like y in the hell would i do that? i have to do soo much shit hw everyday to be even spending the time thinking how to backstab you if i ever wan to lor. i mean like, just drop the past la.. all say wan to drop but nv drop.

MeeN says.. the past is over. y still think bout it? just smile and try to be happy. =]

Thursday, August 21, 2008

well.. guess what.. i just argued with my best friend.. and im feeling like shit now. am i like being too concern or something? or like what other ppl say in a more crude way. im just being KPO. but like wat? cause of one person that i wanted to help. i cause so much people unhappiness and i just totally feel like dying straight. first i was not really feeling that good. and then when i reach home, i receive attitude replies from my bestie.. and from then on, we start on our damn journey of arguing..

and he was like piss off or something? i have no idea.. but i feel that he had change.. TOTALLY.. he become a person i do not really know of.. and that it is also not the first time we argue... if u all know me well, u would know who am i talking about. others who don't know. dont ask me.. because im sick and tired of every single thing in my life already.. im like.. " just give me a break man! " and carrying with that kind of attitude.. i still continued surviving day by day. still showing others the constant smile that always appears on my face so that no one would ever know how trash i am inside.

in the heated arguement, i was being considered a un-caring person as my bestie said that y must i wan others to put themselves into my shoes and spare a though for me.. while im not doing so? actually, it is not it. i have been trying to compromise every single one into my feelings and have been constantly trying to figure out y are they like doing this or that.. but i was dumbfounded when everything shoots back at me.. like.. even my bestie says this to me.. and like im feeling so crap rite now? and sometime, i don even bother to explain myself as everyone will just give me this remark saying " do you think i would actually believe you?! "... so like what's the point of explaining when this is the answer i would get back?

maybe im just being too concern about everything. and i don needa even explain myself.. and i have actually kinda woken up by wat my bestie says about me.. he say that.. no matter how tough and how much effort i am putting in, i won't be able to draw the line with any of my freinds or even ppl that hated me? and with that hurtful reply of his.. i have just woken up... knowing that in this world.. no one could really be there for u.. and in this real world. even ur bestie would just give up and turn a back on you. i have totally learnt a lesson that i shall keep every single thing to myself...

if im telling you all im like tearing now? who would actually believe? people have always been telling me to take things easy. but is it really possible? when u already have a shitty day and ur bestie said something that hurtfull to u?! im sure no one can unless u don reguard that person as your bestie. feeling sick and tired of every single thing in my life.. having a friend don come easy. and not say having a bestie.. its like one in a million.. but if thats the way how things goes... i will just have to wash my hands off every single thing. i don wanna do anything now. i just wanna rest... and just keep resting......

MeeN's soul is dead...

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

OMG!! i tell u.. my stead ashley.. gave me read about the characteristics of a Gemini and i was stun!! cause its like SOOO like me... and she calls me a flirt cuz its so like me TT hahas!! so here it goes...... ^^ [and its really about my character... those who wanna know me more.. read it XD ]

A good looking woman with brains, a very interesting person. She has a fast movement and she could not sit still or stand still long. She is able to do many things at the same time and do it fast. If you date her, you will feel like dating many women at the same time. You can not tie her down with the word “Love” because she cares about love but is it not a major factor of her life.
You have to be able to adjust yourself to get along with her many different characters. She is a dreamer and has many dreams. She is eager to learn something new all the time. Even she is the 2 in 1 mixed character type, she is quite lucky in love. You have to put all your efforts to win her affection.

Even when she likes you and wonder about your wit, she will also see and inspect your bad side at the same time, because it is in her nature. She able to keep all kinds of mixed emotions without annoying you or letting you know at all. She can cheer you up by acting like a free little bird. Her conversation will not bore you. She is able to talk to you in any subjects. She can make you feel like you are the luckiest man alive.
She can make you feel like she needs all your care, but once she needs to stand alone, she can stand alone firmly and comfortably. She can be your best buddy and talk to you about anything. She can join all your activities with the same energy that you have. She is a quick a wit person and learn new things very fast. She can see your projects and she can give you good advice. If she thinks you are not sure that you want her for yourself, she will act like your best friend only, a cool woman.

She can easily make a guy fall in love with her. Her multiple changes and many moods is a “Charm” for many men. She can be laughing for 2 minutes and later suddenly quiet. She wants to find only 1 true love and she wants to meet her dream guy. She expects a lot and nearly too much. She is constantly waiting for her knight shinning armor even she is with a steady boyfriend. She can fall in love or fond of someone else while she is with you.

If you break up with her, she will forget you quite fast, because change is in her nature. The Gemini woman breaks more heart than woman in other Zodiac. Because she is a dreamer and always waiting for her knight shinning armor, so her love life can be complex or a mess. She hates to write a long letter, so if you write her a letter and expect a prompt reply, forget it.
Because she has a multiple personality and multiple ideas, so she hates to put them down in written proof. Because she knows what she belief today can be different tomorrow. She could communication with more than 1 language, a real gifted linguistic. If she wants to tell you any bad comments, she won’t say it straight away, but she will talk to you about many other things and accidentally come to that subject without offending you.

Normally she will not lie. She will work hard and once a while take a long rest. She can get bored and tired with her own surrounding more than at work. She never feels content with her present work, money, or reputations; she will drive to have more. Don’t ask her what is her ultimate contentment for she will not have an answer. Once you get to know her, she will be a supportive person and always be beside you. She has a beautiful dream and she loves to have someone walk side by side with her, together and equally.

MeeN is feeling that someone would actaully know how my character is XD

Sunday, August 17, 2008

LOL!! today was damn cool ok!! at first i woke up at like 11 plus to 12.. then later in the evening, im suppose to meet amanda [ mummy ], yue han, kelvin, lengchye, edmund, leon and timothy at 6pm at tiong bahru plazza... and duh.. the main reason we meet up is cause its CARMEN'S brother brithday!!! XD okok.. then after that we went to... [ ps ar.. i forgot where ] LOLXD to meet up with ashley and carmen..

took a bus to the chalet place that the party was hosted and there had a Bball court.. so all of us went to play Bball XD. ok.. at first it was like im the only girl that is playing as amanda and carmen did not want to play.. after awhile carmen joinned in and followed by amanda.. [ and of course the guys have always been playing la.. -.-'' hahas XD ] and then we were separated into teams to play matches!! XD ok.. and the group is.. ( yue han, timothy and i ) and the other group is ( edmund, lengchye and kelvin[also known as ting-a-ling-a-ling XD] ). Ashley and leon did not play and they both [ the love birds ] sat near the Bball ring.. hahas!

at first, i was like complaining that it's not fair as edmund, lengchye, kelvin and yue han are like Bballers but timothy and i are not. and guess what, only yue han was like on our team.. then im like.. how to win man... and then yue han was like telling me.. " SHERMEEN!! we must believe in ourselves!!! we can do it de!!! " and the next moment i was like.. with that " ya... rite... " attitude.. LOL!! but can u believe it?! we are like even la!! ok.. then i saw carmen standing there doing like NOTHING.. so i got her to join in.. and she is also like a choir member.. so it equals to no Bball experience, she was on my team duh.. XD anyway it don make much of a diff.. hahas!! ok.. then followed by amanda that join my team too! XD

i was like trying to block the other team from scoring and as well as trying to get the Bball of course.. but whenever edmund gets hold of the ball, i sure cant get the ball de -.-'' then everytime edmund got the ball, i will ALWAYS be the one trying to get the damn Bball from him.. [ and i have NO IDEA why everytime its me.. ] and im sure edmund has no idea why too.. since everytime i try to block him, he will say.. " wa.. y it is you again ar.. " LOL!! ok then i was like laughing laughing as a whole lot of funny things happen and everyone started copying the way i laugh.. and it sounds more funny and i laugh even more.. HAHAS!! XD

ok.. then we were like Bballing for the whole time until when we needed to cut cake XD its ice-cream cake!! XD and as usually, we were still de-siao-ing each other even when we are eating the cake and later we wanted to do a video and that the director is Mr LENGCHYE!!! XD which like the video fail as we cant think of a topic in time.. hahas!! ok.. then i acted as a ghost.. and guess what!! EVERYONE GOT A SHOCK!! LOL!!!! damn funny la.. just by seeing the reaction and the faces on them.. ok.. then soon my dad came to fetch me and amanda.. and so the rest went home as well.. XD

MeeN is tired but seriously Happy!! XD

Thursday, August 14, 2008

today was a GREAT day for me man!!! is like.. first was geography.. then the teacher say she wanna return us the test.. then that time we do the test is like structured essay question like that.. then the worst is.. i was still playing com games during that time. so when the teacher say she wanna return us the test papers.. im like OMG......... im so gonna fail man.... then beside me was my "lao gong" yueqin... [ i tell u ar.. my laogong study damn hard de ok.. like everyday study study study.. ] ok.. then i got more stress.. cuz like although the geography lesson is in banding then im like in band 1 -.-'' but the people sitting around me are like E1 ppl.. then like all the smart ppl la... then if they pass.. and i din like so paiseh leh...

ok... then here comes the test paper.. and i got like 10/15.. the next second i knew i was like.. HOLY MAMA!!! I PASS!!! then i was like siao liao... then later yueqin got like lower then me mah.. then she was like very sad.. somemore as a laopo hor.. i also donno how to comfort her... [ i think because if im the one who fail, i wont mind either.. LOL! ] then i know she tried her best and she has been also feeling stress about her other subjects... then its like not as if im smarter then her... so want to help also cannot. ok then the situation now is.. i cant get happy cuz i pass and she fail -.-''

okok... but we soon got over it and TING DONG TING DONG!!! class ended!! its RECESS!!! WOOTS!! ok then we went down for recess.. then i later end recess le i went for my prefect duty and back to class! [ knowing the next lesson after recess is english... i was like.. SIAN AR.... ] then ok but still have to go mah.. so look on the bright side and just smile =) [ although is with that sian smile -.-'' hahas! ] then later my teacher said.. " OK CLASS!!! im gonna be telling you ur test marks for your grammer test and ur PAPER 2 test! " and as usual i was sitting with cassandra and so the usual thing when i came in to class that she would tell me is.. " SHERMEEN!! i miss you leh!! " then i will be like.. oh.. ok ... hahas XD

ok then the teacher wrote on the white board.. saying.. grammar test.. 37 people in class took the test, 3 failed... then in my heart i was like.. wa... 3 fail.. sure not me de la.. i wont be so suay de... then later, the teacher wrote on the board again saying.. PAPER 2 test.. 38 people in class took the test, ONLY 9 PASS.. then as usual, paper 2 is like the grave section where everyone dies as paper 2, everyone knows it consist of 2 compre passages and 1 summary.. and like sec 2 all our english are like done by project work... and now is like all this compre and crap stuff... of course we r like dying man!! mid- year, band 2 and 3 whole class fail english.. so i was very SURE and COMFIRM that.... i will NOT be one of the 9 students that pass PAPER 2 and the highest for paper 2 is 30/50. [ in my mind is like.. siao.. highest only 30/50.. i no need think also know sure wont pass de. ]

then later, the teacher was like.. " OK! i call your name ar... then u all come up to me to see your marks!! " [ although i don hear the teacher saying that... -.-'' but i think cuz i was dreaming la... >.<'' ] okok then later the teacher called cassandra... then i was like looking at her going to the teacher and coming back? so i thought maybe she went to pass the teacher something.. then.. SUDDENLY! the teacher called my name man!!! then i got a shock! and so i was like still sitting at my sit.. then suddenly the teacher ask me go to her.. [ den i tht hor.. she was gonna ask me for my homework leh!! then i scare u know.. cuz i donno got homework or wat then i din do any leh!! ] ok.. then i got up to the teacher... but not so near.. quite a distance... in case the teacher just ROAR at me.. i wont get such a big shock... hahas!

the teacher was like.. " shermeen y stand so far come nearer... " then the way she say hor.. suddenly like very nice... so like i thought like whats up with her man... but since she ask, of course i went nearer la.. then she call me to see the paper that was on the table.. ok.. with that blur look, i don even know wat happen, i just gave her a very blur.. " wat........... " hahas!! then she was like.. look at your test marks.. and when i see, there are so many numbers... so i have a reply like... " where.............." then she pointed.. saying " this is your grammar marks.. then i saw its like 30. so ok good.. then later she say this is your paper 2 marks.. then i see again.. its 26. then later i gave a blank look at the teacher, then the teacher look back at me.. then i have like no reaction for that moment cuz i think im still in my lala land.. then i just went back to my sit..

then Cassandra was like asking " Hey Shermeen!! how much u got for your paper 2? " then i was like.. " i got 26....... " [ still having that sian look.. ] the next moment she heard my marks she was like OMFG!!! how the hell did u get that de!!! i only got 25!! but she was happy as she pass.. XD then later she was like WTH u get so high!!! then i don even know when was this test la.. then suddenly my eyes open SOOOOO BIG.. then i say.. " DON TELL ME IS THAT TIME I DROOL ON THE PAPER DE AR?! " then she was like stun there for bout 3 second.. then she say " ya!! its that one!! " then the next moment we know it, we were like rolling on the floor laughing till stomach pain!! LOL!! XD

ok the reason we laugh like mad, is not cuz i drool.. but is cuz i only remembered that i drool during that test as i just came back from SuZhou that time and i was REALLY tired that i could barely open my eyes and i got like a english test which was this. ok.. we laugh cuz.. during that day when we r having the paper 2 test, as i already said, i was very very tired.. [ i have never like been this tired before? ] and then i am like practically forcing my eyes to open because i don wanna get caught sleeping.. and i was like trying SOOO damn hard to do it la.. [ hard to imagine rite? and that was actually how tired i am... ] then when the test come.. i was like don even have the mood to do la.. then after reading the compre, i don even understand wat the hell the compre was like trying to say?

BUT! i manged to finish both compre VERY fast for some reason as i pratically wrote like rubbish on it.. [ not exactly rubbish la.. but i don really know wats the answer mah... so anyhow bomb lor.. hahas!! ] then when i was doing the summary, it was so much WORSE then the both compre ok... i supposingly, standard summary, we r suppose to find about a minimum oh 15 points.. and guess what, I CANT EVEN FIND 10!!!! then during the test, i was tired and stress at the same time that i cant find.. as its like supposingly my COMMON TEST! then later i just like gave a attitude say la.. " aiya just write all the points that i got la.. if fail then fail la.. not exam also mah.. somemore i so tired... then come back from suzhou only must take test... exam can pass can le la.. this time fail let it be la! "

And that was like the attitude i got... [ cant blame me la.. i was really really REALLY damn tired.. ] then later i just like sleep during the test without me knowing.. -.-'' and i only woke up when the test end.. and i was seriously in a DEEP DEEP sleep... guess how i woke up.. -.-'' cassandra was like shaking me? then when i sit up, i realise i was drooling! the worse is when i look at my paper, my whole paper was WET!! then i straight away look at cassandra.. and cassandra was like looking at me.. !! then she was like " OMG SHERMEEN!! NI LIU KOU SHUI!!! " but at that time... i have like totally no time to feel paiseh lor.. and anyway she is the only one that saw it mah.. at that time, my main concern was.. MY PAPER IS WET HOW THE HELL AM I GOING TO HAND IT UP?!?!?!

but i took tissuse to dry it and handed it up anyway... hahas!! and i slept like 45 mins?! and that was like how slack i was at the test la.. when seeing cassandra when she wake me up, it was like left like 1 more min and she is still writing!!!! then i was like [ wa... so pro man... ] and when now the results come out i got higher then her.. LOLS!! then she was like " SHERMEEN!! Y U GOT HIGHER THEN ME WHEN U R SLEEPING FOR 45 MINUTES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH " then i just started laughing like some crazy jackass.. LOL!! XD

MeeN rocks in english XD

Monday, August 11, 2008

hmmm... for the ppl that wanna shoot me with words, i don't really bother asking who are you or all that.. cuz even if i ask, i know that u also wont tell.. LOL!! XD
i have totally no idea watsup with me ok... if u wanna type this kinda shit in my Chatbox then go ahead XD

walau i think i sot le la... im so sian until ppl say me like that i laugh -.-'' hahas XD okok i will get straight to the point.. for people for no hell reason that wanna insult me with this lowly english of yours, pls read up more.. like newspapers... story books or stuff like that.. because ur english that u use to scold me is really..... shallow i shall say?

hahas!! okie.. the day before, i had a tiff with one of my good friend leng chye.. and the worst is it started of cuz of a little thing.. hahas!! he said that sometimes i am damn guai lan for a reason or two.. and i sometimes think he is kinda guai lan too XD but well, who cares man!! no matter how guai lan we are, after awhile we are still best freinds again! XD hahas! as best friends wont take anything to heart. im sure of that ^^ so friends for life LC XD

another thing i wanna mention here is that I M SO BORED!! can u like imagine??? ppl that know me well sure knows that i don really like hanging out with my parents and all that.. i have totally no idea y ok.. maybe cause of the G. gap we have ba.. but imagine me being sian until asking them EVERY SINGLE DAY the same question. " are we going out today? " and thats what i will ask them -.-'' knowing their standard answer will be a " NO " but i still ask.. hahas!!

just ask for the sick of asking man!! ok then today morning its like partly cause of me, my stead ashley got scold by her dad showing her a black face as she ask if she could go out with me.. T.T [ SORRY DARLING!! for you getting scolded T.T ] hahas XD and so.... my prediction is that she can't go out with me and i will have to rot at home again.. [and my prediction came true -.-'' ]

ok.. being me, the SOT one... anything could happen at like any point of the day. so i was like so sick of playing all the crap games and i just stone at my com doing NOTHING. XD ok.. then i was like thinking to myself about my family.. and hey! i have no idea y, although my bro has always been giving me some kind of attitude... but u know what.. i realise every single time i go out with my friends or what, i will be thinking about my bro leh!!!

okok!! relax ppl!! don stun there! XD i have absolutely NO IDEA WHY?! like hmmm.... how to have an example.. sometimes.. when im out with my friends, i will be thinkin how i wish i can go out with my bro someday.. like together?? [ taking a needle to poke my dreams away... -.-" ] but like knowing that he SURE won't go out with me de.. haiz... hahas i have no idea y.. my bro is like kinda differnt from other broS? like.........

he is not good in being mushy, and when im sad he don really know how to confort me... [ but neither do i know how to deal with him la.. ] and he is not those kind of person that because he is my older bro he will give in to me... and he usually like to see me go mad so he will PURPOSELY lie on my beloved bed.. hahas!! and we usually don talk to each other? he don like me being like a bee keep on hanging around him... and like most of the time he would be playing his games.. or studying...

well... i wonder if we were to actaully go out together and have fun... aiya.. nvm it wont happen... -.-'' hehes!! but for some reason... i still love him as my bro!!! XD

MeeN is CRAZY XD

Friday, August 8, 2008

today its a special date which is 08/08/08!! woots!! okok... hahas!!
todays post will be short and simple! XD

hmm.....

i realise that.. when friends says that they will be there for one another,
they don really exist and it don't usually happen all the time... this is not just bullshitting, but it is the fact. because i have seen things and been through what many others have not.. =]
although the experience may not be always nice memories. but it certainly did gave a big impact on my life.

now i learn to take things easy and just flow with what with meant to be and the people that always put on a mask infront of me.. knowing that all the things they ever said were all lies, i chose to believe what they say as it just comes with one simple reason.. " because you are reguarded as my friend =) " and whatever i say here comes from the bottom of my heart..

people may give replies like.. " do you think i believe u?? " but seriously, the fact is, i don't need u to believe me. i just wan my friends, or now maybe not freinds [ but i reguard them as friends ] all i ever wanted was you all to know the story. =) and like what i always tell my friends, " i don't lie to people cause i find that there is no point lying to people. if i did it, i will just admit it. " but sometimes i really did not do it and no one is there to listen what i have to say..

being the SherMeeN i have always been.. i will get sad.. and angry or maybe pissed because i would think that why would someone think that way of me?!... hahas.. but now? i am totally fine with it as i don't feel a thing anymore.. =)

MeeN is being peaceful and just love it =)

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

walau... today like sai ar i tell u.. LOLXD
ok.. it actually it all started like yesterday nite... i donno y, last night i was like studying studyin and then i was so stress up and i was like dealing with some friendship probs. then suddenly i feel then i cant really breath. at first i tht it was something normal.. then i started coughin alittle.. even the ppl tell me jokes i cant laugh as i will cough.. and when i cough, i cant breath.. ya cant laugh.. -.-'' [ lucky its at nite then happen.. so don laugh at nite still ok.. wont scare ppl -.-'' ]

then i was like thinkin maybe is the sweet i eat.. so not being so bothered by it, i went off to bed as soon as i cant open my eyes to read another words from the text book. hahas! XD then ok!! NEXT DAY!! woke up in the morning.. slighty earlier cuz felix wanna meet me up.. than.. the first thing i woke up is i started sneezing like some crazy freak? then when i stand up i cant even stand properly cuz my head was pian.. then brush teeth everything, went to eat flu tablet and 2 tablet of panadol.

OFF to school! XD.. ok.. then when im on the bus, i started feeling very uneasy cuz i cant really breath well... and i was sms-ing my Mei.. ^^ ok.. then later met up with kelly whom was waiting for me at the bus stop and met up with felix whom was waiting for me at the bus stop as well? LOLXD ok.. then felix pass me a belated birthday present!! THANKS! LOVE IT! XD ok.. then i told kelly that i cant breath went we were like walking on our way to school. then she replied me by saying "woah.. ppl cannot breath still can walk faster then me sia.." then i was like LOL? ur legs short cannot blame mah.. XD

ok.. then sat down at assembly ground.. then the feeling of me cant breath is like getting worse... -.-'' cant stand the feeling.. i open my mouth big big to breath its still the same ok.. its like my lungs is not doings its work!! okok.. then infront of my freinds.. act as if im normal... =D don wan them to worry... until during english period.. [ which is only like the first 2 period -.-'' ] then i cannot tahan liao... then i went to tell me friend that was sitting beside me to follow me go find my form teacher.. then she say... " we do finish summary first then go find " then im like... ok.. im like in this condition liao.. i cant even breath still needa do summary.. LOL!!

then she say " then nevermind la.. u rest ok? wait for me do finish first then i go find the teacher with you " then im like.. " needa pass up today.. if i rest.. then how to do finish.. " then cassandra say " its ok.. i do le then i let u copy " then im like " ok! XD " then my head is on the table liao.. LOL!! but then alittle while later i felt so stupid putting my head on the table and it is not helping me breath better... and i felt like some ppl struggling for air.. ok then i decided to do the summary on my own! =D

guess what!! i finish faster then cassandra -.-'' LOLXD but by the time i finish, english lesson over le.. and the next lesson is physics.. and my form teacher is the one that teaches my class physics.. then the first thing in my mind was like " nvm... no needa go and find teacher liao.. since the next teacher is my form teacher -.- " hahas.. ok then today rite... i have a physics test as well... so i went up to my teacher and told her i am not feeling well.. and i would like to go home after the test.. so she allowed XD

after the crappy test.. which i gave crappy answers... i packed my bag and went to the general office to get the form so that i can prove that im allowed to leave school -.-'' ok then by the time im able to do that im already like sai liao... cant walk properly... cant breath properly.. feel like vomiting... then at last man!! manage to get to mother's office building!! XD then when i went to the life there... my first reaction is... [ wat level is my mother's clinic at ar??? ] then the first level i tried was lvl 5. and....

IT TURN OUT TO BE THE WRONG LVL!! then okok.. i was like feeling still ok... can cope.. then the next number i tht it was is... 13... so i went back to the lift and press 13.. when it open, ITS THE WRONG ONE AGAIN!!! then my attitude is like those sian diao face!! wan die that kind liao.. hahas!! XD then later a helpfull lady who was waiting for the lift ask me if i was going to the clinic.... [ then im like thinking... how the hell she know i wanna get to the clinic man!! don tell me my face really show the wanna die expression thats y she know?! ] hahas!! ok.. then i said ya... then she told me it was the 18th floor... so i was happy that i know wat floor it was.. hahas!!

then when i reach, went to find my mother... then she brought me up to the 19th floor which is also by the same company to wait to get consultation from the doctor... then it was like soooo long before my turn actually came la... then i was shock!! usually is the counter person that calls out the patient names for them to see the doctor... but suddenly when my turn, the doctor herself came out personally to call out my name!!! [ ok.. then i stun there for awhile.. and i even kept the doctor waitin cause i stun.. LOL ] then i went into the room... then she ask ask ask, i tel tel tel..

HERE COMES THE FINAL CONCLUSION!! she says that my lungs the windpipes are like getting harder... due to the use of the inhaller and soon, the inhaller will have no more effect on the asthma... [ actaully.. honestly speaking... the doctor and me actually both know that the inhaller don't react to my body already.. but i din tell her and she din tell me.. LOL but it can be seen that she knows it.. ] ok.. then im liike alrite.. telling her that actually i was finding for the tablets which they are much stronger then the inhaller... then she say that my asthma worsen and blah blah blah... '

but..... in the end i also don care la.. LOL!! just be HappyAlways!! XD then later my mother keep desiao-ing me? and can u believe it?! she actaully learn how to speak my language and mixed it up with hers?!?! cuz i everytime call ppl sucker... or this suck! like that kind... and suddenly cuz of something happen then she suddenly was like.. " THIS SUCK MAN!! " then my reaction was like " OH MY GOSH! when the hell u learn to say this?! " then the reply she gave was.. " i learn from u de lor.. " then the first i shoot her back was.. " sorry hor... form last time till now, i nv use the word suck with a man at the back! i don use SUCK MAN!! i only use suck... usually bo man.. "

then after me saying that, she was like laughing like some siao zhar bor la!! [ mentally unstable.. -.-'' ] LOL!! then she keep saying today its my bad luck day... and so on... hahas

MeeN is fine? i donn wat so say.. LOL

Sunday, August 3, 2008

THIS IS ALL I KNOW!

i totally don't know wat is going on ok... i woke up in the morning already got a argument with my bloody family. then i went to play audi and i saw maple online. so i happily ask her to join me in playing and after 1 round or so, she suddenly just say.. " if hy dare to do anything to us, something will be happening to you next. " then i donno what happen at all, so as usual, i asked her what happen. then maple said " you should know it yourself. " then as soon as she said this, she left the audition room.

and im like stun there?! i don't even know what the fuck has happen and i kana until.. then so i totally have no mood to play. then i went to call maple 2 times... but she did not answer her phone. so i was seriously getting worried cause i don even know whats happening and i don wish anyone to be hurt or angry or whatever crap there is.

and since i heard there is something to do with beverley, i went to call her.. but the call was disconnected and that i was like " if i call everyone and no one wants to tell me what happen, how the hell i know what happen and i seriously wish i know it myself lor! " then later, maple called me back and even if she was going to scold me or what ever, [ but she did not la ] but i was glad she called!! XD cause i totally don even know wat happen so im sure at least she will tell me something?

then later on the phone, maple said that " i donno what complain to hongyeow and that hongyeow is gonna get ppl down or something " and thats all i know. then she said that " i complain to hongyeow that someone bully me or something and thats all. " the next thing i knew was like... " since when in the fuckin days that i return to SG i complainted to hongyeow?! "

some ppl might not believe that.. but the point of fact is that, before i went to the SuZhou trip, i got a feeling that hongyeow like me. so i don wanna the relationship to be beyond the "daddy and nuer" thing, so i like keep away from him.. and that AFTER i come back from SuZhou, I WAS COMFIRM THAT HE LIKE ME! so after i know that he like me, i din even talk to him that much and that i even gave him attitude and all the answers i replied him are so xia lan lor. then i have not been talking to him except some " hi and bye " conversation in MSN. not even on the phone leh.. i din even talk to him on the phone la!

and thats y, if i am not even talkin to him and instead just keeping a distance from him, why would i even tell that someone bully me or wat so ever. the worse thing is i haven even talk to anyone about my SuZhou trip after i came back to Singapore lor! and if i din even say anything. then how can i possibly tell hongyeow?!

and then if u all wanna say in SuZhou i can sms him or even call him what... my answer to you is that i din even call my bloody family! and y would i even call a friend?! and only that night when i was very very upset about what huijun, cherie they all did. i went back to my room and cry.. and as i was crying i was sooo upset that i cant tell anyone so i decided to call hongyeow. BUT, HONGYEOW DID NOT PICK UP MY CALL~!

and then i started crying and weimei came into the room... as well as ling xin and maple.. and as they were conforting me, my handphone rang and it was from hongyeow.. but i was crying so badly that i cant even talk properly, I HANG HIS CALL. then he know that i was cryin so he sms me asking me what happen. and guess what, cause beverley was quite upset during that time as the seniors like huijun they all are like pin pointing her. so she was crying quite badly during the meeting. SO, the ONLY THING i sms back to hongyeow is " im fine.. not to worry.. i don think beverley is ok.. please ask sen teck to call her. " and for all my SMSES that is like the only thing i send to hongyeow!

then after that time i din even sms or made any phone calls when i was in that bloody SuZhou trip ok.. and when im back i din even contact hongyeow... only when i touch down and reach home hongyeow called me and i just say im back.. and THATS IT! i din even say anything else. and because this SuZhou trip was not really going that well for me, so when im back to Singapore i din even tell anyone what happen during SuZhou as i don wanna talk about the past. and the only thing that i tell ppl about the SuZhou trip is, " we got a silver A "

and like thats all for what i tell ? so.. TODAY, suddenly i heard that something has been happening and only now than i know about it. and i don even know what happen lor. but this is my story to prove all of you that wanna know, I DID NOT TELL HONGYEOW ANYTHING AT ALL!

and if worse come to worse you all still don believe, you all can go check with hongyeow and by all means, im EVEN willing to spend time just everyone sit down and get this damn matter clear off. i don wan anyone to get hurt or get threathen by any other ppl. why can't we ppl just live in peace and be friends???... its like every single time things always turn so ugly and i don even know what happen.

MeeN is trying to figure out WHAT THE FUCK ACTUALLY HAPPEN!